Black Taboos: Do Brothers Travel Downtown?

After breaking down last week’s taboo (Is It True Black Women Don’t And White Women Do), I couldn’t help but want to examine the same issue surrounding our Black men.  

We have all heard the urban myth that Black guys just “don’t do it” when it comes to oral sex or what is commonly referred to as going “downtown.”  Don’t believe the hype!  Darling Nikki is here to set the record straight.  Many Black men do enjoy this activity. 

Just the other day, I was reminiscing about an old love and the reasons why I tried to make it work despite the fact that I was not happy.   Was it the fear of being alone (again) or was it his willingness to travel “downtown” that made me stick around?   

The way to a woman’s heart is not going “downtown,” but it does help seal the deal. 

I hate to admit it, but I did stick around for his visits and looked forward to every trip.  Every guy doesn’t take you there and inquiring minds want to know why.  

What’s the big deal?

Consider yourself lucky if you have a mate who loves to “travel” no matter what color he is.   It’s hard to find ANY dude that has the skills to go “downtown” properly, but are Black men more or less likely to pack their suitcase for this trip?

I will admit that men from other cultures (Darling Nikki is an equal opportunity dater) are more open to admitting they like to travel to that region while our brothers may be a little more tight-lipped.  But remember, loose lips sink ships.  Just because he is not talking about it, doesn’t mean he isn’t about it.

Are you giving your man the green light to travel or did he stop at red when he saw your granny panties? Come on ladies!  World-class travelers deserve world-class treatment.  Keep it sexy for him with good grooming and inviting lingerie.

My male companion, who I will refer to as “Mr. Ten,” admits that most Black men do the “smell and sniff test.” If you don’t pass, all travel plans for “downtown” will be cancelled indefinitely.  

After that man-ology I could understand why some men are apprehensive to “travel” and even more so to talk about it.  Let’s face it, our bodies are different.

That got me to thinking, does he pack an umbrella for “downtown” rain showers? What are the risks involved if your man is a frequent “traveler” and you’re not the only town he has visited?  

According to The Center for Disease Control (CDC), “although risk of HIV transmission is lower for oral sex than for vaginal intercourse, HIV transmission through oral sex is known to occur. (Source) 

Although these cases are very low, it can happen.  I definitely promote safe sex and you should too. So what’s a “downtown” brother to do?  Invest in a dental dam or plastic wrap?  I never got the whole dental dam thing.  

“Mr. Ten” told me, if he is going to “do it,” then he is just “going to do it!” I mean where do you purchase these? They don’t carry them at my local drugstore.

In my book, if he’s not down for a little sight-seeing then the tour is over. I have beautiful “luggage” and it should be shown off at every opportunity.  Yet, I must admit, that it may take a couple of “trips” before he sees my secret compartment.  

For those of you who’s “luggage” is questionable, don’t even play yourself and demand that he go “downtown.” You can’t demand first class treatment unless your presentation is worthy.

If you are smelling like roses, well groomed and giving Victoria Secret’s half your paycheck and your mate is still not interested in exploring this region, he may not know how. Don’t be afraid to give direction.  Everybody has to start somewhere and there’s nothing wrong with working your way from the bottom up.